Dear Dr. Dave and Dr. Dee,
My best friend just told me that she is pregnant with her first child, and she mentioned how fun it will be to have a baby shower. I did not know if I was supposed to then say that I was willing to host her shower? Am I supposed to throw the baby shower for her or is her mother? I cannot afford to foot the bill for a big party. Also, when should the shower be given? When should invitations be mailed? If I host the baby shower, will this set a precedent? That is, will I then become obligated to throw one for each of her subsequent babies?
Traditionally, a good friend hosts a baby shower about two months before the baby is due. However, nowadays relatives and coworkers can also host a baby shower.
Baby showers were traditionally given only for the first baby. But, you will not have to host any more baby showers for her because any subsequent baby showers should be given by her close relatives.
A baby shower does not need to be an expensive undertaking. Instead of inviting everyone the mom-to-be knows, you can have a limited guest list of only close friends. Her relatives may throw her a baby shower, and her coworkers could throw her a separate baby shower as well.
The baby shower can be hosted at your home with simple snacks, cake, coffee, and soft drinks. Or, you can have an afternoon tea, light luncheon, barbecue, or potluck. You can also co-host the shower with one or two other friends.
The shower lasts about two hours. You may want to plan a few baby games, and shower favors can be given to guests when they leave. Shower favors can be a small item such as scented candles, bath beads, small bag of chocolates or cookies, sachet, or flower seed packets. However, it is not mandatory that you play games or have shower favors.
Mail invitations about four weeks before the baby shower.