Dear Dr. Dave and Dr. Dee,
My officemate wants to set me up with a blind date with her brother's friend. The main reason that I keep refusing is that I've never been on a blind date before. Also, I'm not a partier, don't drink, and am pretty boring. But, my mom says how am I to meet people if I don't go. My mom thinks it's no big deal, just go and have fun. I'm rethinking, and wonder if there is any advice you can offer so I won't feel so insecure?
Your mom is right, just go and have fun. If you want to keep the date low key, then make it a lunch date instead of dinner. Lunch is less pressure, you can dress more casually, and if you don't hit it off, then you can make your exit gracefully after about an hour. You may feel nervous, but your date will be nervous as well.
A person isn't boring because they don't party or don't drink. Boring people are self-centered and only talk about themselves. As with all interactions, give your date your undivided attention, ask questions and be a good listener. On a first date, stay away from controversial topics (politics and religion) until you get to know the person better.
10 BLIND DATE TIPS
1. Location: choose a public place where you can converse with your date. Have lunch, coffee, or drinks.
2. Clothing: dress nice, but be comfortable. Avoid too much make up and cologne.
3. Split the Bill: discuss up front about splitting the bill.
4. Cell Phones: Turn your cell phone off or to silent when you arrive at the date
5. Conversation: be a good listener, ask questions, be friendly, be yourself. Avoid politics and religion on a first date. Talk about hobbies, interests, activities, and stay upbeat and positive.
6. Drinking: avoid excessive alcohol, it clouds your judgment and you want to stay sharp.
7. Focus: full attention should be on your date, maintain eye contact. Avoid checking out other people who walk by.
8. Expectations: be open-minded about your blind date. Do not expect perfection.
9. Sex: avoid having sex on the first date. You do not really know this person, get to know him first.
10. Ending the Date: be honest about wanting to see each other again.