I have been married for 3 years and we have a 1 year old daughter. My mother-in-law has never sent me a birthday card or even acknowledged my birthday in any way, not even a phone call to say "Happy Birthday." It never really bothered me until my daughter turned "One" four months ago, and my mother-in-law sent my daughter a nice gift, and also sent my husband his usual nice gift for his birthday last month, but didn't even send me a card for my birthday last week. My husband thinks that I'm being too sensitive.
Dear Feeling down,
No, you are not being too sensitive. Ignoring your birthday is a snub, and your mother-in-law is snubbing you with your husband's permission.
As soon as you were married, she should have treated you and her son equally. If she sends him a birthday gift, then you should receive one as well. When she did not send you anything, and completely ignored your birthday, your husband should have said something to her. Before his next birthday, he should nicely tell her that he feels uncomfortable getting a birthday gift from her when you don't receive anything, and that she doesn't need to send gifts to him, just to the granddaughter. She may actually welcome just exchanging gifts with her granddaughter.